This past week I was riding my bike home from sending off my last group of the summer. It was about 9:30pm and I was ready to get home and relax, so I started my journey. Shortly after getting to the crowded section of my commute, my headlight went out. About a minute after that, my chain started making weird noises so I had to stop and tinker with it in the dark. By the time I got to the bike trail, I was frustrated but cautious because I couldn’t see much. I decided to pull over, drink some water, and clear my head. I then remembered that I had a spare mini bike light that I got on Bike to Work Day, so I quickly strapped it on and was feeling refreshed and ready to go home. Once I wasn’t as stressed about not being able to see, I found myself completely at peace and filled with joy. What a privilege it is to enjoy a night bike ride in a city I love. Going home to a house that is safe and full of people I adore.
I decided to go off the path and ride around Mile High Stadium since I bike next to it everyday. It was empty and quiet. I rode around the side and began staring at the Denver skyline on a clear night while I pedaled my trusty Sasha. Breath-taking. I then began speaking out loud to the night, as only crazy people do, saying “Oh Denver, you’ve been so good to me. I’m going to miss you and hold you in my heart.” And it was at that moment that I rode into a mini pothole and almost ate pavement. I’m so graceful sometimes.
But on the reals. I’m really going to miss this place. My last post described not being ready to leave, and while I still haven’t packed (yikes!), I’m feeling at peace about ending this chapter of life and beginning my next one. I have been blessed and honored to be here this year and I have certainly learned a lot about nonprofits, myself, communal living, outdoor-sy activities, social injustices, and everything in between.
I’m really ready to be home for a hot minute. I haven’t seen my people in a long time and I’m ready for the comfort of home and family. I’ll be able to share my experiences from this past year with my home congregation and I’m very much looking forward to seeing the people who have supported and loved me from an early age until now. Going home to me is just as much about seeing my family, sleeping in my bed, and driving my car as it is about going to my church and feeling the warmth and comfort uniquely CLPC.
I am certainly not ready to unpack, clean, organize, and repack. Moving is the worst. I keep asking myself why I keep doing it, but I know why. At this point in my life I need to go, do, learn, struggle, and explore elsewhere. I feel called to these places and I’m not ready to be somewhere for a long time, but I feel that on the horizon. Maybe law school will slow me down, but who knows.
Prayers for transition are needed and appreciated. Saying goodbye to my Denver family has been hard so far, and will continue to be hard, but I know they aren’t goodbyes forever. I’ll be back. Maybe just to visit and pick up my kitty, but Colorado has certainly become one of my favorite places in the world, and I can see myself living here again in the future.